The executive board of NYU’s Pi Kappa Alpha announced late last night the results of its no-confidence vote directed at chapter president Josh Toribio. The thirteen member panel voted unanimously to remove Toribio from his position for, “failing to uphold the frat’s values, traditions, and beliefs, as well as bringing the organization into disrepute.”
In recent months, Toribio, an Environmental Science major in CAS, has found himself under increasing pressure to resign as allegations of him being a totally decent, nice guy run rampant. Tensions came to a head last weekend, when Toribio allegedly walked a drunk sophomore to her home, stopping to get her pizza on the way.
“That was the final straw,” said chapter treasurer Vincent “The Squeeze” Capicola. “We let the his polite, courteous nature fly, we let his penchant for walking old ladies across the street fly, hell we even ignored his disinterest in being misogynistic! But this was just too much. He had to go.”
Toribio, who volunteers at a soup kitchen five days a week, was unavailable for comment, but sources close to the upstanding gentleman report that, “he’s saddened by the turn of events, but respects his fellow brothers’ decision. On the bright side, he’ll now be able to devote more time to his non-profit.”