NYU Stressbusters Announces New “Bust Your Stress By Busting A Nut” Happy Endings Program

Stressbusters at NYU is known as an incredibly fun and far-reaching community wellness program that helps countless students manage their finals week stress. However, this year, they have truly gone above and beyond.

“I would have had a nervous breakdown for sure,” says junior CAS student Alex Robbins. “I don’t think I would have finished my final essay if I hadn’t finished, if you know what I mean.” We know what you mean, Alex.

Sophie Martin, a graduating Stern senior, is an avid fan of the program. “I am already done with finals, but other things can stress you out, you know?” Martin says with a smile. “I had to have lunch with my mom last week and I couldn’t have done it without the Stressbuster services. Now if you’ll excuse me, this interview is stressing me out.” The administration has yet to respond to complaints that allowing students to complete work-study hours by volunteering for Stressbusters is literally just prostitution.