Tisch senior Sarah Carroll is one-upping everyone for Lent this year by, rather than jokingly giving up college, giving up on all her dreams instead.
“This year, I’m going the extra mile. I realized that it would be a lot easier to move home and never amount to anything in life, so that’s what I plan to do,” Carroll explained as she threw her writing notebook out the window. “Why work hard for what I want to do, when I could just sit on a porch every morning and live off my parents’ wealth?”
Carroll’s friends are worried: “We were just kidding when we said we were giving up college for Lent. I’m incredibly ambitious and passionate about what I’m doing even though it’s stressful. I think we accidentally broke Sarah?” her roommate described as she put encouraging Post-It notes on the bathroom mirror.
Carroll’s friends have secretly signed her up for a wellness center appointment next Tuesday.