Gallatin Student’s Vocabulary Reduced to Only the Word “Problematic”

After weeks of endlessly calling people out on the internet and in person, Gallatin Sophomore Gabby Rubinoff has been rendered unable to say anything but the word “problematic”.

It all started when Gabby decided to approach a group of white people doing Tai Chi in Washington Square Park to talk to them about cultural appropriation. She got on a roll, and once going, found that her brain was stuck on the single thought.

“Honestly, it’s kind of an improvement,” said Rubinoff’s roommate, Jessie Schweigert. “Now, I don’t feel guilty when I dub over telemundo with my friends when we’re stoned.”

Gabby herself, though unable to express feelings articulately, seems to be dealing with the new change of lifestyle well. She says things are going “Problematic problem,” and she hopes to “problem prob problematic” in the future.