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Author: Reese Witherfork

Articles On Campus 

Brittany Hall Council Approves Switch From RAs to Secret Police In Addition to Enhanced Interrogation Techniques

September 30, 2016September 30, 2016 Reese Witherfork

Strange things happening in Freshman dorms are par for the course, but Brittany residents suspect something more sinister is afoot

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Articles Lifestyle On Campus Sports 

CONTROVERSY: NYU Quidditch Team Kneels During Harry Potter Theme Song at Home Opener

September 19, 2016September 19, 2016 Reese Witherfork

NYU’s most prominent athletic team took a stand, or rather a knee, for what they believe in this week during

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Articles Lifestyle On Campus 

Kid With Acoustic Guitar Definitely Worst Thing At This Party

September 17, 2016September 17, 2016 Reese Witherfork

Aden Gratzky had it all figured out. He and his new roommates were finally about to throw a rager in

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Headlines Other 

Freshman Loses Virginity, Finds it Under his Desk Later

December 10, 2015December 10, 2015 Reese Witherfork
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Headlines 

Freshman Finally Changes Cover Photo from That Picture of the Skyline She Found on Google

December 7, 2015December 7, 2015 Reese Witherfork
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Headlines Tisch Uncategorized 

Tisch Sophomore Becomes Recursion of Stereotypes

November 19, 2015November 19, 2015 Reese Witherfork
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Headlines 

BREAKING: NYU Bus Hits Woman on 3rd and 10th, Now Forced to Punt

October 13, 2015October 13, 2015 Reese Witherfork
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Press Releases 

5 Simple Steps To Contact Your Fucking Advisor

October 13, 2015October 19, 2015 Reese Witherfork
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Headlines 

Stern Junior Would Like to Go to One Fucking Class Where the Professor Doesn’t Mention Apple

September 27, 2015September 24, 2015 Reese Witherfork
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Headlines 

Freshman Real Full of Himself After Kissing Two Girls in One Weekend

September 14, 2015September 14, 2015 Reese Witherfork
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Articles Opinion 

Hey Emily, What’s Up?

April 13, 2015August 18, 2015 Reese Witherfork

Hey Emily! We have Economics of Global Business Together. Yeah, I know, haha, this professor is such a dick.  I

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Sports Uncategorized 

Spike Lee Named New NYU Basketball Coach

March 31, 2015March 31, 2015 Reese Witherfork NYU, nyu basketball, spike lee

In a surprise move, the NYU Athletic Board has named famed director Spike Lee the next coach of the Violets

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Academics Uncategorized 

Gallatin Announces NYU-Online For Anyone Looking For An Emptier Degree

March 30, 2015March 30, 2015 Reese Witherfork

NYU officials went public today with a new online alternative for any Gallatin student hoping to give less credibility to

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Academics Lifestyle 

Pike Brother On New Sexual Misconduct Training: “It’s fucking bullshit. I’m already amazing at sexual misconduct”

March 11, 2015 Reese Witherfork fraternity, new york university, NYU, pi kappa alpha

Mike McCrystle, brother of Pi Kappa Alpha fraternity, met the University’s new mandatory Sexual Misconduct Training with scorn and derision.”It’s

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Academics Uncategorized 

An Editorial Message of Goodwill This Finals Season, From Washington Square Local To You

December 15, 2014December 14, 2014 Reese Witherfork

I’ve wanted to get this off of my chest for a while, but I’ve never been able to contain my

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Academics 

Alison Leary: “Winter Break is Cancelled”

December 14, 2014December 14, 2014 Reese Witherfork

  With the first snowfall of this winter, Alison Leary has risen from her coffin of misery and shattered dreams

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Recently Divorced Advisor Encouraging Students To Just Give Up Now
Headlines 

Recently Divorced Advisor Encouraging Students To Just Give Up Now

November 10, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Recently Divorced Advisor Encouraging Students To Just Give Up Now
Graduating Senior Wondering How To Inform Parents She’s Moving Back Home Forever
Headlines 

Graduating Senior Wondering How To Inform Parents She’s Moving Back Home Forever

October 26, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Graduating Senior Wondering How To Inform Parents She’s Moving Back Home Forever
Stern Student Going As “Financial Success” For Halloween This Year
Headlines Stern 

Stern Student Going As “Financial Success” For Halloween This Year

October 23, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Stern Student Going As “Financial Success” For Halloween This Year
Junior Amazing At Life™, Terrible At Life
Headlines 

Junior Amazing At Life™, Terrible At Life

October 15, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Junior Amazing At Life™, Terrible At Life
Sophomore Can’t Sit In Washington Square Park Without Fear of Being Interviewed
Headlines 

Sophomore Can’t Sit In Washington Square Park Without Fear of Being Interviewed

October 4, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Sophomore Can’t Sit In Washington Square Park Without Fear of Being Interviewed
Senior Running Late For Class Just Skips Whole Week
Headlines 

Senior Running Late For Class Just Skips Whole Week

October 3, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Senior Running Late For Class Just Skips Whole Week
Freshman Takes Picture In Front of WSP Arch With Caption “My City <3"
Headlines 

Freshman Takes Picture In Front of WSP Arch With Caption “My City <3"

September 13, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Freshman Takes Picture In Front of WSP Arch With Caption “My City <3"
Headlines Other 

Freshman Loses Virginity, Finds it Under his Desk Later

December 10, 2015 Reese Witherfork Comments Off on Freshman Loses Virginity, Finds it Under his Desk Later
Headlines Other 

Depressed Sophomore Begins Smoking Cigarettes As Excuse To Stand Outside Alone In The Cold

December 10, 2015 Micky Fine Comments Off on Depressed Sophomore Begins Smoking Cigarettes As Excuse To Stand Outside Alone In The Cold
Headlines 

Attempted Joke In Essay Title Prepares Professor For C+ Paper At Best

December 10, 2015 Micky Fine Comments Off on Attempted Joke In Essay Title Prepares Professor For C+ Paper At Best
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