Professor Automatically Gives ‘A’ To Kid Wearing Apple Logo Hoodie
A professor in CAS announced this week that he will be giving an A to the kid who wears an
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Author: Murray Samsonite
NYU To Test Self-Driving Buses By Firing All Drivers, Hoping For Best
NYU will be firing all of its bus drivers this week. As such, when next semester begins, the university will
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Sophomore’s Summer Job Actually Just Cult
After a thorough Washington Square Local investigation, sophomore Sarah Bartshort’s internship was confirmed to actually be just a cult. Bartshort,
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OPINION: CAS Senior Running For City Council Might Be Severely Unqualified, Potentially Fucking Over Thousands of New Yorkers, But At Least He’s Putting Himself Out There, Y’Know?
Campus has been abuzz this week with the news that Chetan Hebbur (it’s pronounced Nit with a “wit”), a senior in
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Archivists Find Evidence Stern Once Held “Morse Code Is All About Confidence” Seminar
A group of senior History majors unearthed evidence this week of a century-old Stern seminar entitled “Morse Code Is All
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Freshman’s Article On Medium Shockingly Well Written
In a shocking turn of events, the NYU community was rocked by revelations that freshman Rodrick Simpleton’s Medium article was
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Peace Corps To Begin Placing New Recruits in Weinstein
Beginning this fall, the Peace Corps will begin placing new recruits in Weinstein. The placement is part of a larger
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John Sexton Forms 1860s Irish Immigrant Gang Out Of Boredom
In an apparent nod to Martin Scorsese’s 2002 film Gangs of New York, President Emeritus John Sexton formed an 1860s-style
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FUN FACT: Andrew Hamilton’s Chief Of Staff Is Also Andrew Hamilton
Although nobody ever talks about it, Andrew Hamilton is more than just President of NYU. Yes, in addition to his
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Campus Mugger Revealed To Be Two Tisch Kids Doing “Helping Hands” Drama Exercise
After a rash of muggings on campus this past month, students are concerned about safety when walking through key areas,
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Gallatin Sophomore Moved To Share Life Story After Professor Calls Her Name During Roll
A Gallatin sophomore was moved to share her life story this week after her professor called her name while taking
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Faculty & Students Agree: New Mercer St. Building’s Beautiful Roof Garden Makes Us Forget About Slavery In NYU-Abu Dhabi
After NYU released the plans for 181 Mercer St., the all-purpose building that is replacing Coles on Mercer and Bleecker,
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WSL Editorial Board: NYU Should Be More Transparent So We Have More Things To Make Fun Of
After heavy deliberation, the Editorial Board of Washington Square Local has agreed that NYU needs to be more transparent about
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Gallatin Junior Purges All Friends Who Don’t Respect His Narrative
This past week, Randy Carpets, a junior in the Gallatin School of Individualized Study, announced that he would not respect
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Rudy Giuliani Named Langone Department of Psychiatry’s “Patient-In-Residence”
NYU Langone announced this morning that Rudy Giuliani, former Mayor of New York City and current surrogate for the Trump campaign,
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Junior Too Busy Admiring Own Taste In Music Listens To Entire Album Without Realizing It
This past week, a Gallatin junior going by the name “Dumpster Fire” listened to an entire Mobb Deep album without even realizing
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NYU Bus Drops Depressed Sophomore Off At Rock Bottom
In an cruel nod to “Spongebob Squarepants,” a depressed sophomore was dropped off by an NYU bus at a stop
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Study Shows Monopoly Money More Useful Than Campus Cash
A new study published earlier this week definitively proves that Monopoly Money is more useful the NYU’s Campus Cash. Conducted
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Cinema Studies Department Announces They Will Offer “Madagascar: David Schwimmer, Lemurs, and the Spectre of White Imperialism” This Spring
The Department of Cinema Studies in Tisch has announced a last-minute addition to the Spring 2016 Course Listing entitled “Madagascar:
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NYU Study Abroad Program Moved to Epcot Center
NYU announced on Monday it would close all thirteen global campuses used for Study Abroad and move the entire program
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Andrew Hamilton Resigns President-Elect Position After Visiting New York for First Time
In a surprise move, Andrew Hamilton has announced he is turning down the position of NYU’s sixteenth president, a position he
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Frat Upstages UCLA Blackface Party with Hyperrealistic Columbus Day Reenactment
NYU fraternity Gamma Phi Zeta held an historically accurate reenactment of the Columbian Exchange this past weekend in honor of
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John Sexton Moves Office to Corner Booth of Times Square TGI Friday’s
In preparation for Andrew Hamilton’s ascension to President of the university in January, current NYU President John Sexton has moved
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NYU Alumni Debtors’ Prison, Small-Ass Quadrangle Among Things Included in 2031 Plan
As more details of the NYU 2031 plan reach the public, it’s difficult to comb through the layers of info
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