Upside Down ‘U’ In Park Leaves Many Asking Questions

The scene was one of confusion and occasionally terror this past Tuesday, as many students gathered around a mysterious upturned ‘U’ on the north side of Washington Square Park. It is unknown when exactly the structure, which stood nearly 80 feet above the crowd, appeared and for what purpose.

“Is this some sort of publicity stunt by Andrew Hamilton? Because it’s not funny,” said Rebecca Walker, a junior in Gallatin, who stood on the other side of the park in case the cryptic monolith suddenly fell or collapsed. “If he wants to earn our respects as students, he needs to address the mounting problems of college debt and ingrained racism in the educational system, not build bizarre monuments to his own hubris.”

Others were more puzzled than anything to see the large capsized letter cast a shadow on their once-beloved park.

“I mean this park is basically our campus, so it’d make sense if they wrote like ‘NYU’ with big statues. But where are the ‘N’ and ‘Y’?” asked Troy Nadir, a freshman in Steinhardt, who lives in the Hayden and saw the strange stone edifice from his window. “Just doesn’t add up.”

NYU has yet to make any official statement on the matter yet, but one anonymous source within the administration was reported as saying, “Just wait until you see what’s under it.”