Led Zeppelin Fan Definitely Misunderstood “Classics” Course Material
As the semester winds to a close, sophomore and Classic Rock superfan Danny “Baby Clapton” Carter admits he was dissatisfied
Read more
Author: Dick Tarpis
Upside Down ‘U’ In Park Leaves Many Asking Questions
The scene was one of confusion and occasionally terror this past Tuesday, as many students gathered around a mysterious upturned
Read more
New Virtual Reality App Shows NYU Students What It’s Like to Have Normal College Experience
With its urban landscape, lack of a definitive campus, and sparse sense of community, some NYU students complain that they
Read more
Junior Accidentally Mailed Faculty Vacation Home
CAS junior Tommy Branton this past Sunday signed for a large package that appeared to be a luxurious vacation home meant
Read more
Roommates Report Feeling Closer After One Catches Other Masturbating
In an uncharacteristically warm and emotional BASE meeting, sophomores Josh Coughman and Jeff Young reported that they feel closer than ever
Read more
NYU Swim Team to Use East River After Coles Closure
NYU officials announced yesterday that the East River will serve as the new aquatic training facility for the men’s and women’s
Read more
Student Who Stole Library Book in 1836 Finally Released From Detention
Oliver Partridge, a student who stole a copy of “The Canterbury Tales” from NYU’s library in the mid-1800s, was finally
Read more
NYU Langone Set To Offer ED (Early Decision) Pills To Prospective Freshman
In collaboration with the pharmaceutical giant Pfizer, NYU Langone has announced new pills to help motivate high school students who have
Read more
Bobst Architects Admit They Never Considered Wind
Following a highly publicized internal investigation and some mysterious creaking sounds around the Washington Square Park area on windy days,
Read more
Gallatin Senior Excited To Graduate With A Concentration In “Harvard Law Degree”
After finalizing her schedule for the Spring of 2016, Trish, a Gallatin undergraduate is set to graduate NYU with a
Read more
New SafeRide App Features Surge Pricing Dependent On Student’s Danger Level
TransLoc Rider, the new Uber-style app that offers Safe-Ride services to NYU students, will begin charging surge prices based on
Read more
Coles Construction Worker Fired for Accidentally Tearing Down Bobst
In a major setback to NYU’s 2031 Project, the Elmer Holmes Bobst Memorial Library was destroyed Thursday by a confused
Read more
Burger Studio Interactive Menu Adds “Spit” and “Personal Insult” To Toppings List
Looking to broaden their already impressive selection, NYU announced plans that “Spit” and “A Personal Insult About Your Appearance” will
Read moreRecently Incarcerated Student Says He Prefers Prison To Weinstein
When Chad Kingston was arrested for dealing molly out of his dorm room in Weinstein, he thought his life was
Read moreDining Dollars Revealed To Be A Social Construct
Upon paying $7.50 for a box of Honey Nut Cheerios, Sophomore Megan Martinson came to the profound realization that Dining
Read moreSenior Just Now Realizes “NYU Minute” Newsletter is Play On Phrase “New York Minute”
At 2:37 PM today, upon seeing his weekly email about things he would never, ever attend, Senior Bradley Mischens had
Read moreStudents Gather In WSP To Commemorate Speculated Tragedy From Siren Noise
Washington Square Park has become the scene of an outpouring of support Friday afternoon as various student organizations came together
Read moreFive Dead Found In Housie’s Attic, Crawlspace
The mood at NYU was solemn this week after five corpses were found in the attic and crawlspace of NYU’s
Read moreNYU Set to Respond To Allegations That Trolley Is Actually A Bus
Caught amidst what is surely the biggest scandal of the 2014-2015, the NYU Transportation Department is expected to respond to claims
Read moreSome Cool Facts You Might Not Know About NYU’s New President, Andrew Hamilton
You think your parents are bad? Hamilton was born from a couple of rowdy kids out of wedlock. Later orphaned.
Read moreBobst To Close Distinguished Masturbation Room
Take one last whiff, people; the Elmer Holmes Bobst Library has announced plans to close its popular windowless room. The reservation-only
Read moreNYU Langone Medical Center to Offer Student Housing in ICU
Following the uproar surrounding New York University’s lack of “guaranteed housing” for all students in the 2014-2015 academic year, the
Read more