So, you thought you had a really close, tight friend group, but somehow you got cut from the shortlist of Spring Break plans? Not to worry, Washington Square Local’s got you covered with these five simple alternatives:
1) Stay In New York
Millions of tourists come to New York City each day to catch the sites. So it’s got to be special, right? Maybe if you go to the top of the Empire State Building, you can catch your friends’ plane taking off while they voyage to Puerto Rico. Who needs sunny beaches and mojitos when you have the cold, lonely, icy and unforgiving streets of NY? I’d pick that over Puerto Rico any day, wouldn’t you?
2) Go Home
Now there’s nothing embarrassing about having to go home for Spring Break. After all, they say your family is your best friend. So now it’s time to cash in on that. So get ready to spend your spring break with all the things you love: curfews, questions about your future, limited freedom, and no girlfriend. Also, I’m sure your alcoholic mother’s cooking will rival your friends’ Michelin Star restaurant.
3) Follow Them From A Distance
They think they can go to Puerto Rico without you? Fine. But that doesn’t mean you can’t go to Puerto Rico without THEM. Fuck those assholes. Take your own damn flight. Book your own damn hotel. And secretly follow them to every single destination. This way, you’re not actually missing out. Right?
4) Photoshop Photos Of Yourself Somewhere Awesome
Beat your friends at Spring Break by Photoshopping pictures of yourself having a blast at the best destinations! This way, everyone will think you’re a globetrotting global citizen who just loves to party! Don’t know Photoshop? That’s okay, you’ll have all week to learn while your friends are actually having a great time without you and slowly forget your name.
It’s better than the alternative. I think. I tell myself that every day.