NYU Swim Team to Use East River After Coles Closure

NYU officials announced yesterday that the East River will serve as the new aquatic training facility for the men’s and women’s swim team after the Jerome S. Coles Sports Center closes later this February.

The decision, delivered aboard the S.S. Student Debt, the NYU Presidential Yacht, came after months of deliberation as to where the swimmers would train after the pool shuts down with the rest of the complex.

“It’s kind of an odd choice, considering we already use Palladium and could keep doing that. But the athletic director insisted that the river offered us a unique environment to hone our skills,” said Junior Ryan Sterne after he emerged from his test run in the river’s waters. “There’s definitely something in the water because now I have weird fins and an extra toe, but whatever it takes to win I guess.”

Swimming tryouts will also be held in the New York landmark, with the team accepting anyone that manages to make it out alive.