BREAKING: Professor Continues to Use Dry Erase Marker After Acknowledging It’s Empty

On her ever-potent journey to deny technology in the classroom, Dr. Myranda Heinz (CAMS Professor, The Adolescent Paradox) made a vow to be old school this semester and only use Dry Erase markers and a white board- a vow still unbroken, despite the markers running completely out of ink.

Reports began flooding in early this week of an ink-outage in Silver Center, where the bi-weekly lecture takes place. “I don’t get it.  She even made a joke about how the marker was dead. But then she just kept using it,” said junior Carter Beaufort. “At first it was kind of faded and just hard to see. But now she’s just drawing invisible lines. I mean there’s literally no ink left. “

But this is no isolated issue. Since this news broke, students from classes such as Emerging Diseases and Creative Non-Fiction have all come forward with their own accounts, their own truths of this tragedy. Hopefully if enough of these stories are told, some real change might finally occur.