Debate Team Unable To Decide What To Get For Lunch

Despite hours of intense deliberation, NYU’s debate team has been unable to reach a decision over what to get for lunch. The issue began when Donovan Kruger, a star member of the Extemp team, delivered an impassioned statement on the merits of Chinese takeout.

Public Forum debater Rachel Fredericks responded with an eloquent rebuttal advocating for bagels. Fredericks, however, was backed into a corner when a cross examination revealed she had Chinese the previous night, and was thus putting her own desires over the good of the group. This, however, was quickly dismissed as an ad hominem attack that failed to address the merits of her argument. Terry Gill, a rising member of the team, asked his fellow debaters to reconsider the definition of lunch, and whether bagels could truly fit the necessary criteria.

The argument concluded when the participating parties realized it had gotten to be dinner time and a new conversation was necessary to resolve the dispute.