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Author: Margaret Twatwood

Articles Lifestyle On Campus 

We’re All Interested In The Cherry Blossom Festival. All of Us.

March 23, 2017March 23, 2017 Margaret Twatwood

Fallen velvet petals beckon our aching heels Rustling in mother nature’s breath between blade of grass and strong red root

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Articles Lifestyle On Campus 

BREAKING: Jay’s Mom Staying On The Couch For Awhile, Apparently

March 3, 2017March 3, 2017 Margaret Twatwood

Jay’s Mom (Tufts ’88), mom of Jay (Gallatin ’19), has reportedly been bunking in her son’s UHall room for about three

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Articles Lifestyle On Campus 

Roommate Ushers In New Spiritual Phase With Incense, Lots of Rocks

April 26, 2016April 26, 2016 Margaret Twatwood

Last weekend Gallatin sophomore Maya Quinn’s roommate Taylor Gray (LSP ‘19) disturbed the entire floor by choking it up with burning

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Articles Lifestyle On Campus 

Freshman Reflects Pensively, Loudly On Past Drug Experiences

April 15, 2016April 15, 2016 Margaret Twatwood

CAS freshman Marc Tran decided to impart some much-needed wisdom he’d acquired from one of his shroom experiences to a

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Articles Lifestyle 

Girl Who Transferred After Freshman Year Confirms You Would’ve Had More Fun if You Went to Penn State

December 8, 2015December 7, 2015 Margaret Twatwood

After spending a semester at PSU, Lindsay, a former CAS student, has posted enough trashy party photos over the past month

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Academics Articles 

Freshman Drops Out to Pursue ‘Music Career’

November 20, 2015November 19, 2015 Margaret Twatwood

After just three months, Jeremy Chapman (TISCH ‘19) has decided to drop out of NYU so his parents can pay for

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Headlines Other 

NYU Reveals New Downstein South

November 19, 2015November 19, 2015 Margaret Twatwood
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Headlines Other 

Hayden to Start Serving Cronuts

November 9, 2015November 9, 2015 Margaret Twatwood
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Headlines Other 

Everyone at Brooklyn Party Ready to Go Home Immediately After Arriving

November 9, 2015November 9, 2015 Margaret Twatwood
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Articles 

Large European Family Works Together to Ask Freshman for Directions

October 22, 2015October 22, 2015 Margaret Twatwood

Wednesday afternoon, Amaya Jones (Stern ‘19) was stopped by all seven members of the Bergfalk family, and attempted to string together

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Headlines 

Freshman Braves Long Weekend With Overbearing Parents for Comfort of Two Ply

October 13, 2015October 13, 2015 Margaret Twatwood
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Articles 

Freshman Psych Major Diagnoses Roommate as Major Fucking Bitch

October 7, 2015October 9, 2015 Margaret Twatwood

After just a few weeks of living with her randomly assigned roommate, Tori Dalian ’20 has drawn some intriguing insights about

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Articles 

New Study Reveals NYU Students Incapable of Earnestness

October 2, 2015October 2, 2015 Margaret Twatwood

A new study conducted by the University of British Columbia revealed that the current population of NYU students are physically incapable

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Articles 

Student Who Attends Club Meetings “Just For the Free Food” Accidentally Becomes Educated, Cultured Person

October 1, 2015September 28, 2015 Margaret Twatwood

After over three years of bouncing from Hillel events to Sci Fi Club meetings in search for free food, senior Carrie

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Recently Divorced Advisor Encouraging Students To Just Give Up Now
Headlines 

Recently Divorced Advisor Encouraging Students To Just Give Up Now

November 10, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Recently Divorced Advisor Encouraging Students To Just Give Up Now
Graduating Senior Wondering How To Inform Parents She’s Moving Back Home Forever
Headlines 

Graduating Senior Wondering How To Inform Parents She’s Moving Back Home Forever

October 26, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Graduating Senior Wondering How To Inform Parents She’s Moving Back Home Forever
Stern Student Going As “Financial Success” For Halloween This Year
Headlines Stern 

Stern Student Going As “Financial Success” For Halloween This Year

October 23, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Stern Student Going As “Financial Success” For Halloween This Year
Junior Amazing At Life™, Terrible At Life
Headlines 

Junior Amazing At Life™, Terrible At Life

October 15, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Junior Amazing At Life™, Terrible At Life
Sophomore Can’t Sit In Washington Square Park Without Fear of Being Interviewed
Headlines 

Sophomore Can’t Sit In Washington Square Park Without Fear of Being Interviewed

October 4, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Sophomore Can’t Sit In Washington Square Park Without Fear of Being Interviewed
Senior Running Late For Class Just Skips Whole Week
Headlines 

Senior Running Late For Class Just Skips Whole Week

October 3, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Senior Running Late For Class Just Skips Whole Week
Freshman Takes Picture In Front of WSP Arch With Caption “My City <3"
Headlines 

Freshman Takes Picture In Front of WSP Arch With Caption “My City <3"

September 13, 2016 Air Bud Comments Off on Freshman Takes Picture In Front of WSP Arch With Caption “My City <3"
Headlines Other 

Second Semester Senior With Headphones In Unaware That His Life Is About To Get Really Shitty

December 10, 2015 Dick Tarpis Comments Off on Second Semester Senior With Headphones In Unaware That His Life Is About To Get Really Shitty
Headlines Other 

Group Message From Past Class Unnecessarily Still Active

December 10, 2015 Air Bud Comments Off on Group Message From Past Class Unnecessarily Still Active
Headlines Other 

Junior Calls In Sick To Whole Life

December 10, 2015 Air Bud Comments Off on Junior Calls In Sick To Whole Life
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