NYU Makes Oscar Predictions, Shows Startling Trends by School

 

This Sunday, the 87th Academy Awards will award the best and brightest in achievement in film this year. Everyone loves to speculate, and the NYU student body is no different. Washington Square Local has polled all of NYU and have found some interesting prediction trends within schools and departments. Check ’em out!

 

College of Arts and Sciences: Boyhood.

A film about the beauty, simplicity, and grace in an extraordinary, yet average American suburban life. Or as, some critics said, boring and felt like it would never end. Much like CAS.

 

Stern: The Wolf of Wall Street

Although staff for WSL tried to explain to the polled students that Wolf of Wall Street was nominated last year, not this year, they insisted it should still win Best Picture.  It seems that they’re pretty sure it’s the only movie that’s ever existed.

 

Steinhardt: Whiplash

Finally, after years of being mocked for playing the jazz bassoon, Steinhardt students get a film that showcase their struggle: a film that shows how god damn hard a music major can be (psych! Get a real job, future Drivers’ Ed teachers).

 

College of Dentistry: American Sniper

A surprising pick, but when you think about how dentists love to have you sit for long hours so they can witness your pain, it kind of makes sense. Also, suicide rates for dentists are second only to soldiers with PTSD. Not a joke, just a fact.

 

Tisch: N/A

This one’s on us. We only talked to three Tisch students about this year’s Oscars before we wanted to fucking kill ourselves, and were forced to conclude that the three students who claimed that mainstream cinema was dead and that their own three minute experimental animation should win all awards were, perhaps, not a representative sample of the Tisch School of the Arts.

 

Gallatin: Benedict Cumberbatch

Although we made it very clear that this was a poll for BEST PICTURE, Gallatin also made it clear that they believe this award should go to Benedict Cumberbatch, who is just a person with a silly name, not a motion picture.

Poly: Not Applicable

No students interviewed had seen a film in the last year.